An Honest Post About How I Really Feel

I’ve been jumping from one draft to another finding the perfect photos to accompany the perfect words, and I guess you can say that I still messed up on this one. I haven’t been able to write anything “good” for months and I just realized why it has been that way – I am completely and utterly consumed. I’m distracted, overwhelmed, and outright exhausted. I’m consumed with life and work. I’m distracted by jumbled thoughts and unbaked plans that are constantly being made up, one after the other. I am overwhelmed with feeling of fear, worry, and excitement. To feel all these emotions all at once baffles me. It’s a strange sensation.

My photography started off as my own little hobby I was obsessed with. It didn’t have to be perfect, it didn’t have to follow rules, it didn’t have to be anything else other than what I wanted it to be. It just had to be mine and knowing it was mine was what I loved.

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I try my best to approach each post I publish with structure, direction and a hint of emotion because, well, it’s me. 2017 has been a whirlwind and it seems that there are no signs of slowing down. I’m thankful for it, don’t get me wrong! But it feels like I’ve just started, and already, things are… like this.

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All I hope for is that things start looking up from here. Rather, my spirit and energy gets a positive punch into them.

 

Photos by Gio Lo
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Think Green

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I always find myself holding photo sessions amidst the woods or some place taken over by nature. In a previous post, I mentioned how nature has this calming effect over me – as if an affinity for it is present in me and I don’t find this hard to believe. The greens give a “I’ve got my shit together, thank you very much” sense to my photos and, yes, I take it as a compliment. I’ll stop babbling here. Toodles.

Appreciate

A lot of times, we forget to notice the little things that take part in our day to day life. Have you ever realized how we take breathing for granted? It has become so involuntary that we forget it’s importance – life. I read this quote earlier this year and have sworn to live by it for the rest of my life:

Little is needed to live a happy life.

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My inborn affinity for nature has never faded and I doubt that it ever will. Being around it brings so much life into mine and I can never thank Mother Nature enough for it. I mean, just look at those colors the sky has to offer!

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This post is here to remind you to never stop appreciating the little things in life because they matter the most. Be humble. Be kind. Be reminded what brought you to where you are today.

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Photos taken with a Nikon D300 during 4:45PM – 5:00PM sunset.

Lack of Self

By now, some of my readers would have probably noticed how I have somewhat of a battle with myself. All these unknown, unsettling emotions constantly flowing within my system. It’s tiring.

I had a session last week for work in a public park around the Quezon City area. I must say, the play was quite picturesque. It was such a breather for me and my friend/co-photographer, Hershey. Work has been extremely stressful and having to go out and be surrounded by nature like that, with the scorching heat and all, it was refreshing.

I’d like to share with you the photos I took whilst waiting for our client to arrive at the venue.

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The search for myself is an unending and unpredictable one. How do I know if I’ve found it? When will it ever end? The answer lies with happiness. Pure, beautiful, and unconditional happiness.

Quintessential Living

I’ve only just settled into the cold hard bed that is November, and already, I am bewildered by what this month has brought and what it has yet to bring. (Still a little hungover from October’s happenings but, hey, I’ll get over it.) Now, in spite of the challenges ahead, I am quite hopeful of the opportunities I have yet to receive for myself. I continue to question the abilities I hold as a being on this planet. Am I enough? Am I at my best? Am I giving too much? Regardless of what the answers may be, surprisingly, I’ve got a feeling that I might just be on the right track.

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When questioning life’s Jack-in-a-box moments, the film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty always come to mind. It’s not that I hold a secret life behind what I wish for my readers to perceive of me. No. Thinking about it now maybe I should create a secret life. Ala Vivian Maier perhaps? Although…. what good will this bring? Also, I haven’t figured out how this would benefit my already messed up state as a 21-soon-to-be-22-year-old living in 2016. This topic most definitely deserves an individual post.

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I have not found the quintessence of life. I am still on a voyage to discover it but I do feel like I’m on the right track to finding it! I urge you to do the same.

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“What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?”

 – George Eliot

Olympus OM-1 | Kodak Ultima 1oo

Afternoon Delight

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Spent a beautiful afternoon a few months back with my favorite person. We tried out this fairly new coffee shop called Cake Draft offering us a good view of a beautiful sunset and a cool summer-like breeze.

Olympus OM-1 | Kodak Ultima 100